Recently I wrote a blog about money beliefs and I talked about what we learned from our parents about money, both positive and negative beliefs.
This time I’m focusing on how we can be good money role models for our daughters. It’s particularly important for our daughters futures that we are bringing them up to be financially independent, not enough women alive today are financially independent, there is still a perception and stereotype that money is the man’s domain.
Mum’s as role models
I wonder what role each of your parents, or significant others in your close family, played with regard to money? Was dad the breadwinner and mum got housekeeping money from him each week? This was the case in my family, certainly until my mother went back to work when I was 14. We learn about life and how to navigate it through our parents, they teach us how to tie our shoe laces, how to eat with a knife and fork, they help us to learn to read and they demonstrate to us how we should behave. Their thought patterns and ways of behaving are often unconsciously transmitted to us – our parents are our role models, as children we copy behaviour, both the good and the bad and we learn how to conform to stereotypes.
In our family setting our daughters are watching and learning how to manage their money, in particular they will be looking at their mum as their role model.
Our job as parents is to prepare our children to be independent adults and that’s a tough job!
What do we want for our daughters?
We want to give our daughters the best start we can to create financial independence for themselves, we want them to feel confident about their money, we want them to understand the principles of spending and saving, to understand how credit works etc etc. This can be difficult if we don’t feel confident with money ourselves, so part of being a good role model is knowing how to get the right advice and support for yourself. We want to demonstrate to our daughters that they can take control of their financial situation from early on in their lives and that this will help them with their financial independence.
Remember the habits we develop early in life can be some of the hardest to break – both the good and the bad ones!
Practical Tips
Here are some of the ways that you can be a money role model for your daughters (of course this also applies to your sons) –
- Set a positive example by talking about money openly, it should not be a taboo subject.
- Share your good habits with them, for instance by telling them you can’t buy that new handbag until you’ve been paid next month and paid all the household bills, then, if there’s money left then you might treat yourself.
- Help them develop good money habits, by for instance giving them pocket money for doing tasks around the house, so that they earn it rather than it just being given to them. They start to see that things don’t comes for free.
- Help them to understand money management, through encouraging them to spend some of their pocket money but also saving some. Help them to see how saving a small amount on a regular basis can soon mount up, then they can buy that that bigger toy that they want because they have enough money of their own.
- Take them shopping with you to help them understand the value of things and just how much it costs to feed the family. You could compare that to their pocket money amount to illustrate the point.
- Learn to say no to ‘treats’ explaining how money must be used on essentials first, don’t let them have everything they want, this helps teach them the value of money.
- Talk to older children about your income, taxes and paying essential bills each month, show them the details and how you budget each month so you don’t run out of money.
Being a good money role model for your children will lead them to develop positive habits around money which they will take into their adult lives.
Originally posted on She Can Prosper.com